last post before i turn 21

1 hour 20 minutes more... about that time... well, i'm not really 21 this 12.00 o'clock by the way... about 21 years ago, i was born somewhere about 16.46 pm... well i'm not sure about it.. it was written in my birth certificate. the hospital clock might be a lil bit fast or a lil bit late from the exact time.. plus minus i guess.. if everyone keeps thinking the way i am, then there'll be a very big argument about your time of birth.. heheh...

first of all, thanks mama for giving birth of me... through cesarean section... well to have me, it's quite trouble i guess... my mum experienced the placenta previa (have to search in the web to find what its name in English or medical term)... bad for her i guess. Thanks mama for having all those kind of trouble. i'm so sorry by the way. thanks to ayah also... for all the scientific process that takes place in "forming" me...

i don't know what exactly i want to say in this post. i guess it's not only about "thank you" things. i've been thinking a lot about what am i supposed to write for this entry.. i wanna make it special... but i don't know how. so i create a lot of question.

in this 21 years of living, have i ever feel glad of doing something that at first i am hesitate? i guess a lot. but not many... somehow, when i feel hesitate of doing the thing, it sure end up worst... but not all. there still something that i'm glad doing it. ahh.. i'm so not knowing how to elaborate this..

in this 21 years of living, is there anything that i really want and i didn't get? haa.. i'm not born into a bedtime stories which whatever they dream will come true. in fact, i have a lot of things that i want but i keep it secret... it's not about taking care of others feeling... but it is more to my own feeling by the way.. what if i keep hoping to have it yet nothing comes to me? by keeping it to myself, i guess, that's the only way i'll forget it.. if i have it later, i'll be so grateful. if i didn't get it, it will just fade away, the wish.

in this 21 years of living, is there anything that i feel regret of? i don't want to say this now. if i'm regret of what i'm doing, i'm afraid, there will be a lot of regret come in future. i fact, i'm afraid of the phrase "regret of what i'm doing". what i believe is, if i regret of doing this thing, anything related to this things in the future will be a big failure.

there're a lot of question that i have answer just now. but i guess only these 3 question i really want to share the answer.

i don't really remember my memories that i have before. somehow, i pray once before. "ya Allah, please just let the good memories to stay while the bad one, please take it away".... even there are still bad memories lingers in my head, but any kind of childhood memories that i guess is bad for me, i just can't remember it unless someone makes me remember it.. haha... i found it interesting by the way.. Thanks Allah..

somehow a lot of things I've got to experience... being a teacher, being a student, being a violinist, being a performer, being a phone seller... and i'm proud of it...

i'm not sure if i really have something more to say... i should stop.. i talk many ridiculous things after all... somehow it's bored... now it's left about 30 minutes before 12.00 am... this year, no celebration again.. i guess i stop celebrating my birthday since i am 18... i do celebrate my birthday last when i am 17... i wonder if i will celebrate again in future, but i think it's not really needed after all

up till now, i have 2 things that i really want.. soon or later if i didn't get it, i'll buy it myself.. and these two things, i wont forget as i already told someone that i want them... muahahaha...

*Al-quran with translation <--- i just want to know what is the meaning of every word i recite...*

*A necklace with key as a locket <--- i have one before, i guess i'm around 15 or 16 that time, but my mum says that if someone wear a necklace with key, it shows you're already 21... so i ask her to keep it for me and once i turn 21, i want it back... it cost only RM2 by the way... i ask her again this year if she still have it, but then she said,"entah ada, entah tidak" (in another word, she not sure if she still have it) (-.-"") so i guess, i need a new one. soon or later.. even if it cost 100 and above, i'm still going to find it and wear it.. for sure!!! that's it.. ngeh3

between: happy birthday to me :))) let me be the first to wish myself :D

thanks Allah for letting me to live up till now. even i'm not a good muslim, but as time flies, i wish to be a better one... to everyone else who read this, please pray for me... thanks a lot :))

raya yang....

semua org pun update bout raya..hurmm~ nak update gak, but no serious event larr time raya ri tu... kami lebih kepada bergambar.. ntah lah.. mood kali ni lebih kepada bergambar je.. humm

raya first.. macam biasa, pagi raya pergi solat sunat hari raya kat surau IPD Seremban.. tema tahun ini..pink. tapi gambar dalam kamera mama, so, tak dapat nak diuploadkan disini... selepas salam2 n mintak maaf,((si kucing pun salam ayah juga..huhuhu)), kami rehat sekejap and balik ke kampung wan di selangor. hurm..

duit raya di sini agak banyak yer.. huhu.. wan bagi 10 bugs... every year pun macam tu.. dia memang bagi cucu2 yang besar2 ni nilai yang besar.. n pakcik sahak gave me RM50. the highest amount this year.. En Ayah bagi juga, RM 100,tapi dia bagi sebelum raya... so, that one tak consider as duit raya k.. itu dipanggil "duit belanja raya".ngeh3

my mum dia da mintak my uncle crkan tiket utk balik ke kuala kangsar @ ipoh @ taiping, tapi, tiket habis.. mana tak nye..cr tiket esok nak raya.. memang la da habis.. jadi, En Ayah decide utk hantar kami terus ke Kuala Kangsar.. heee~

"Ayah kena balik esok subuh tau. tak boleh lama.cuti tak de, kena present hari isnin, nnt tak sempat", dalam hati aku.. " haish..esok kena balik, maknanye lusa jugak lah balik tu" hahah... jahat tak? and kami sampai kuala kangsar about pukul 10.30pm.. dari Jeram, Kuala Selangor pukul 5.30pm kot..tak ingat..but area time cm tu ah.... and sampai2 je terus makan.. dorang buat BBQ... ada coleslaw lagi..eh, cmtu eh eja dia?

tido sangat lewat that time. kami tgk video kami menari masa family day ri tu.. ahahah..damn worst! jangan dibuat dah. by the next morning, bangun sangat lewat.. pn mama suda menjerit menggunakan high pic nye ((ahahaha, now i know dr mana i dapat saprano voice)), sampai my cousin ckp "mak chak punya suara, nyaring" huhuhu.. selepas siap2, kami pun mulakan sesi bergambar sesama cousin.. huhuhu... sangat best. n tak beraya mana pun..duk umah je.. ke Kuala pun idak, ke kedaipun tak.. dok ngadap lappy je..

ni ada 2 generation.. me and my cousins and our nieces and nephew.. my cousins children actually

me in yellow

raya third baru beraya jauh.. ke bagan serai n taiping.. bagan serai sebab rumah my cousin punya ehem2, n taiping rumah my cousin punya kawan punya kawan. ahahah.. no duit raya pun..but bergambar lagi.. heheh..

ni all my cousin... grey theme

me in orange.heee~

balik pun da dekat malam. kami dok enjoy sakan je la.. lepas solat, kuar pi Kuala kangsar plak.. pi amik gambar sana sini.. lemas tol pakai jubah.. ahaha... maybe sebab inner tu panas kot..hehehe... lepas ni cr yang kurang panas sket.. huhu...

balik ke seremban, tumpang my cousin sampai KL, then kami naik komuter ke seremban.. dalam komuter my adik buat hal pulaaa.... tak tahan nak tekucil.. so i said to my mum " mama gi seremban dulu, anis bawak adik gi buang air", and kami berhenti di Tiroi.. 1 more station utk sampai seremban.. tapi sebab si adik dah tak tahan sangat... so, pergi je laaa..

comeykan pose nih? ahahah..my brother punya idea tau.. his pose larr.. my pose tak..ngee~

sebabkan itu, kami terpaksa tunggu another 1 hour utk ke seremban. keretapi buat hal plak.. lambat gila..sampai en Ayah membebel2 dalam telefon marah saya.. adoi.. sabar je lah.. bukan niat saya nak berlama2 di tiroi ayah.. keretapi tu buat hal.. kalo lah tiroi tu ada midvalley or JJ or Isetan or Pavillion or anything related to it.. boley laa berniat nk lama2.. ni, tempat tu scary kot... ish...

da balik lagi bertambah boring laa.. tak jalan mana pun.. dengan tekak yang sakit.. memang dok pantang itu ini la jawabnye.. so then decide cr tiket awal.. dapat tiket jumaat ke perlis.. yay naik kereta api.. suka~ huhuhu

boringkan entry nih? tu sebab malas nak cerita.. pic masa kat kuala kangsar time malam2 tu tak dapat nk letak lah.. tetiba hilang plak.. dah hilang mood nih.. huhuhu.. ngee~

len masa lah saya letak k..daa~

saya tiba tiba happy

nak tau kenapa? sebab kereta suda ada di rumah.. hohoho... even though my dad tak happy sebab kena keluarkan 1600/= ganti gearbox yang suda hancur..huhu..

maybe petang ni kot, pergi ambik tiket keretapi balik perlis.. owh tempat itu lagi..hehehe... can't wait actually. i feel like when i'm at home, i use less my brain to think critical things. bila balik unimap, laju je kepala otak nak pikir... hurm...

this sem, akan ada banyak perubahan.. perlu ada.. mungkinkah saya akan kurus? we'll wait and see larr... i hope so..banyak nye mulut2 yang tak reti diam. haish~

UniMAP..here i come (in two weeks time)

ps//... ayah saya kata kalo ada duit, dia nak belikan kereta... boley bawak balik unimap... for me... ada, ada la..tak de pun tak pe.. kereta is not yet one of my priorities. kalo ada, baguih jugak... huhuhu... just pray~

am i a bad sister? owh yes i am

yesterday, the whole house of mine black out... disebabkan rumah kami is somewhere in the centre, so, macam kilat tu sambar umah kami. while everone else punya rumah dah recover, kami punya rumah still bergelap.

my younger brother...hurm... i don't know what to say. dia tu penakut melampau2. kalo kami suruh dia naik atas sorang2, mesti dia tak mau. penakut. and the whole house semalam bergelap menyebabkan dia berhimpit dengan kami... sampai i rasa sesak nafas.

then after ada org datang betulkan, dia ckp fuse da terbakar, so dia direct current kan. damn..bosan for a few hours, i didn't care. i want to play with my lappy. so, i open and main game dalam lappy... bosan jugak. turun bawah, i saw my younger brother blum tido lagi... so i lay besides him and stare at his face.

timbul idea jahat... i pegang hidung dia, kuis2 sikit..then the conversation begin

me: Adik, dekat adik punya hidung ada ulat warna putih.
((dia pegang hidung dia macam nak buang ulat tu.))
me: adik pegang buat apa? dia dah masuk dalam hidung dah.
him: tipu!
me: betul la....((sweet silence)).. habislah.. esok adik bangun, lubang idung adik dah tak de dua dah... tinggal satu je.lubang besarrrr..

he stares at me. tahan gelak je lah'

him: kakak ni, jangan lah tipu... jap adik tanya mama
((mama turun tangga))
him: mama, ada ulat tak kat atas hidung adik?
mama: ulat apa?
me: ulat yang kalo dia masuk hidung tu nanti dia makan isi hidung
mama: haah ada.

hahaha...mama pun subahat gak. then my younger brother lay back. stares again at me. and then dia buat macam bersin, hoping benda tu keluar laa.. then i say.

me: tu la, main tempat merepek2, jadi budak nakal, ulat tu memang suka kat budak nakal.
him: mana ada adik main kat tempat merepek. adik main kat taman je..
((silence, and then, he starts to merengek))
me:gi jumpa mama
((ran to my mum))
him: mama, ada tak ulat atas hidung adik?
mama: ulat apa anis?
me: ulat yang warna putih tu la. yang makan hidung tu.
mama: ha, seh kan biar ulat tu kuar
((my younger brother buat macam bersin dua kali,))
mama: dah kuar dah.

dia dah macam gald benda tu tak de kat dia. then i say

me: gi tido, nanti benda tu datang balik
(he ignore)
me: degil la dia ni. ha, tu atas hidung tu ada warna putih, ha, abis la dia dah masuk balik hidung adik.
(muka curious)
me: esok, adik bangun, hidung adik tinggal satu lubang je...

and then, straight dia nangis...WTH??? hahahah... waktu tu my mum tgh ckp telefon, and i said

me: jangan nangis, nanti dia kuar.
(drop phone)
mama: dah dah, gi tido, lambat tido, nanti lagi di kuar

dia trus pergi tido kat atas toto tu,

me: selamat malam
him: selamat malam(without opening his eyes)
me: takut ke?
him: takut.

hahahah...kelakar. then i leave him, naik atas jap,dalam pukul 1 pg, still tak leh tido, my mum said to me... dia sangat takut, sampai mengigau. and bangun pagi tadi, badan dia sangat panas, macam nak demam. bangn pagi tadi pun, he asked once again to my mum," mama, ada tak ulat atas hidung adik?" before dia gi sekolah..

hohoho... jahat gila i kan..ngee~~~ sorry..saja nak menyakat..geram sangat... now i know that my younger brother is afraid of cockroach, darkness and ulat atas hidung..heheheheh

saat-saat berharga

huh.. today is my last day in seremban... cause we're heading to selangor first to fetch my grandma... she wants to follow too.. yes.. of course.. i'm the first grandchild to be in the university... kinda excited, proud, happy.... but also..sad... i believe that i'm not going back to seremban for several month... i think so~

in our plan.. we're heading to selangor by this night, stay one night in kampung, than... move on to parit buntar perak by tomrrow and then only went to perlis to send me to UniMAP.. hurm~

just wanna say... i'll miss my bed.. the place where i spend more at home.. even to online i'll bet at my bed... it's the most comfortable place for me...

i'll miss my cat... sometimes i think i would like to bring them along.. but.. sure it can't be.. heh~

and also... i'll miss my family...naa~ it's ok.. i'm not going there to flirt but to study...mom, dad, alif, mok, tam, teh.. please pray for kakak k... i'll be missing u guys.. huk3

it's ok then.as.the.one.i.like.before.is.so.far.away.from.me~

UniMAP...Here I come..

after a long discussion with my family... then... settle... hehe..

all of sudden, i feel pity to my parent... but do i have to blame myself? they want me to success but i feel like i'm burdening them when i'm going for this...

the day i got the offer, that night, i heard dad said to mum if it so desperate... h'll going to sell the car... i don't know... what i know now is once i enter there, there's no more idea on looking to the handsome guys in the lecture hall and no more playin..

it's time to study... refreshing all my memories since i am form 4.... have to study back my physics.. hek3

UniMAP> BIOSYSTEM ENGINEERING....Here I Come!!!!!!

I Feel sucks!

Alhamdulilla... i got UniMAP... under course: kejuruteraan Biosistem... tak tau lah future aku apa... but aku betul2 rasa cam TAK NAK PERGI..

aku tau...yang aku memang minat gile kat engineering... tp entahlah... tengok surat tawaran tu...

Rujukan Kami
:

UNIMAP/PEND/107/2/RK90/N/B/JUN2009

Tarikh: 18 JUN 2009


NUR SYAHIDATUL ANIS BINTI NASARUDIN
90071804****
NO. 264, JLN AROWANA 10,
TAMAN AROWANA IMPIAN
70300 SEREMBAN
NEGERI SEMBILAN

TEL : 0123210967

Saudara/i,

TAWARAN KEMASUKAN KE UNIVERSITI MALAYSIA PERLIS (UniMAP) BAGI SESI AKADEMIK 2009/2010


Sukacita dimaklumkan bahawa saudara/i telah berjaya ditawarkan untuk mengikuti pengajian di Universiti Malaysia Perlis (UniMAP). Pihak Universiti mengucapkan setinggi-tinggi tahniah atas kejayaan ini. Berikut adalah perincian tawaran tersebut:


Program Pengajian: KEJURUTERAAN BIOSISTEM

Kod Program: RK90

Peringkat Pengajian: IJAZAH SARJANA MUDA

Pusat Pengajian: PUSAT PENGAJIAN KEJURUTERAAN BIOPROSES

Sila datang mendaftar di:

Tempat: KOLEJ KEDIAMAN UniMAP,
KAMPUNG WAI KUALA PERLIS,
PERLIS.

Tarikh: 28 JUN 2009

Masa: 8.30 PAGI - 2.00 PETANG

Bayaran Semester Pertama: RM 1,798.00


Yuran Pengajian Setahun: RM 35,675.88
Yuran Yang Dibayar Oleh Pelajar Setahun: RM 3,168.00
Kos Yang Ditanggung Oleh Kerajaan: RM 32,507.88


Saudara/i akan mengikuti Program Pengajian Kejuruteraan selama empat (4) tahun. Saudara/i hanya perlu membayar anggaran RM 10,972.00 sahaja untuk mendapat Ijazah Sarjana Muda Kejuruteraan . Sebanyak RM 119,059.52 lagi ditanggung oleh Kerajaan Malaysia.





2. Bersama ini dikemukakan lampiran-lampiran yang berkaitan dengan tawaran kemasukan. Sila baca dengan teliti arahan yang diberikan. Seterusnya sila lengkapkan lampiran-lampiran yang berkenaan untuk dikembalikan pada hari pendaftaran.





3 . Semoga kemasukan saudara/i ke UniMAP dapat dimanfaatkan dengan sebaik-baiknya dan menjadi titik permulaan kepada kejayaan-kejayaan lain yang akan menyusul dalam hidup saudara/i.

Sekian, terima kasih.


'BERKHIDMAT UNTUK NEGARA'‘Dinamisme Baru, Wajah Baru’


BRIG. JEN. DATO' PROF. DR. KAMARUDIN BIN HUSSIN

Naib Canselor

inila benda yang menyebabkan aku down gila! aku dah tak tau nak wat apa. because i've neve been given chances to talk.... if i can't settle this in three days... i'll not going to this...
i feel very sucks now

Happy Mother's Day Mama

A little bit late to post..but HAppy Mother's Day Mama... suppose it's should be a very fine simple celebration.. but then... something happened....

i went to KL yesterday... because yan and uncle are going for umrah... so we stay at Yan's house for a night... Tengok AF...and i have to said dis..penipu punya Astro... tak nak aku tengok AF dah! huh!

so... esoknye kami ke KLIA. best..tapi... SOMETHING HAPPENED

suma org tau tax kat KLIA sangatlah tinggi. so i decide to not buy anything. then, my brother merengek nak beli McFlurry.... it cost RM 6.30...2 bugs more then the actual price...sangat lah bengang...and I said to mama... jangan turutkan... bukan busuk hati..but bosan ngan attitude both of my parents yang suka sangat turutkan adik i.

and then as usual... diturutkan jugak..and i was like yelling kat my mum.. saying something yang still bertapis... but sangat menyakitkan. she didn't express it to me.. but she talk with my other aunts saying what she do is right.. nothing wrong after all.

the whole day of mine was sucks!

i always want to fixed with my pricipe...parents always right... tapi.. untuk benda macam ni.. i don't think it's right.

Please Mum and Dad.. i'm not jealous.. but i want him to be better in future. if you keep giving what he wants... do you think he can?

i am so dissapointed.. Sumpah